Sunday

I could not have started off Sunday morning better if I tried. I woke up with the kids jumping all over me in bed.

We stopped at Taco Shack on our way to St. Edwards park. And it was such a beautiful morning. Cool. Fresh. Washed. Not your usual September morning in Central Texas.Vivian and Evan finished their egg and bacon tacos while standing in the back of the car. Then we walked down to Bull Creek and Jo made boats as effortlessly as Thor Heyerdhal and the kids floated them down the creek. Everyone got muddy and wet and we went back home.

I woke my dad up. He ate a two-egg omelet with tomatoes and a touch of sausage. We cleared bamboo from the backyard. The kids got muddier. Then they ate Maggi noodles for lunch and Vivian and I left for Crenshaw's Gym - her classmate's birthday party - while Evan complained that he wanted to go to "nastics" too. At Crenshwa's Vivian had a great time. She played and partied and jumped on the trampoline and climbed the rockwall and did forward and backward rolls and hopped across the balance beam and ate more cake than anyone else.

Then we went home. I tried to feed my dad lunch but he only ate chips. Vivian and Ava played out in Karen's front yard. And the moms hatched a plot. Hopdoddy's for dinner. Sounds sweet as apple pie till we were seated outside on the patio with our gluten-free buns and baby kale salads  and medium-well grass-fed burgers and the waitress asked if we wanted anything else.

At that exact moment the kids and the porch and the weather and the entire cosmos conspired to make everything perfect. So we demurred for a fraction of a millisecond and ordered a round of the "Doble Fina Margarita" - silver tequila, freshly-squeezed lime juice and house-infused Triple Sec in a glass rimmed with black salt.  Who says atheists don't believe in heaven?

Time stood still or rolled on depending on whether you were us or our waitress. The kids played. The rounds multiplied. The evening grew even more perfect. Till we had to text Jen and ask for help. Two drivers, to be exact.

Help arrived. And not a moment too soon. When Evan ran out of limonade he complained "Mommy - I need more Margarita!". Teeth were brushed. Pajamas donned. Storied read. Good night kisses kissed. Dad fed. Blog updated.

A good Sunday. If I were God I would rest on Monday. But I hear I have a workout. And I don't think Jen is going to let me off because Tim is out of town.

First ip5 Photos

I like the iPhone5 camera. I've gotten used to the quick response times and reasonable low-light capabilities of an entry-level DSLR for a few years and considered my ip3 camera a poor substitute. So far I'm impressed with what the ip5 camera can do. And the basic native post-editing capabilities.

In the first photo Evan is again on top of a giant pumpkin at Whole Foods. After I took this photo, the pumpkin started rolling. I had to yank Evan off the pumpkin before it rolled over him. He found it hilarious and tried to repeat it. Austin's granola-women leaving and entering WF did not approve.

The second photo is from this morning. Vivian and I went to the UT soccer stadium so she could participate in the Marathon Kids kick-off program. When we got there it was raining. And we couldn't find her school PE coach or anyone from her class. We eventually found four other kids from her school. Vivian was bummed. But her spirits lifted once we started running. She sailed through the 400m and high-fived every UT athlete who cheered her on.

Crazy Camouflaged

I walked out the house the other day and almost stepped on her. Crazy was laying on the dirt under the tree and I didn't see her till I was almost on top of her. I waited till she settled down again and then took this photo. No wonder we end up with a lot of feathers on the front porch. I've added another photo of Crazy for those who haven't see her up close. Simran took that photo a couple of years ago.

It's probably time to call it for Abe. He "moved" to the country before we left for India. He was last seen a few months ago. Though he peed on everything (I really mean everything) and was the most anxious living thing I knew (and I know a few anxious humans), he'll be missed. He was definitely a part of the fam. And he was so handsome. Even my dad asked about him a few days ago. RIP dear Abe and may your days be filled with lots of geckos where ever you are.

Working Out Again

The Again ruins it. Like - quitting smoking Again. Or dieting Again. But - and here's the predictable but - I'm finally getting back to some sort of normal schedule after 13 months. The good life in Hyderabad and the traveling to places like Goa, Hong Kong, Hawaii and Tahiti aren't work-out-inducing - at least not for me. I need the near-ugly Spartaness of RedBlack gym and Jen's coaching. Three times a week. Let's see how it goes. So far I'm dreading the workouts before and loving the feeling after.

Dona's Photos

Here are some pictures from my cousin Dona's phone. The first is fuzziest but probably the most poignant. Three generations of Chatterjee men. The top of my grey head is the only ghostly indication of my presence. Hmmm - wonder what that means.

Vivian is wearing a stick-on mustache at Whole Foods in the second photo. In the third Dona and the kids pose on pumpkins again at WF. In the last Evan is cruising out of a slide at Amy's Ice Cream.

i5

Evan and Vivian - this post is about something called a phone. We use it to call each other and also communicate with each other in various even more primitive ways. We carry these things around in our pockets everywhere we go. When I was a child a whole family shared one. It was attached with a wire to the wall and was about the size of your head.   

Mommy gave me my birthday gift early. At 10:30 am this morning she walked into the house and handed me a new iPhone5. And announced that my old phone wasn't working anymore. I was thrilled. The 3GS was beginning to feel a bit dated. I have not been able to turn it off for the last several months. The power-off switch just doesn't work. So I stow it away on all those thousands of miles of flying I have done since this problem developed. And hoped that my not-turned-off iPhone doesn't cause an airplane to explode or crash or wander off-course or do whatever they make them do.

The new phone looks good. It's light and skinny in width and depth - so skinny it's almost difficult to hold. Some gratuitous design details indicate that someone with Steve Job's aesthetics didn't painfully ponder each tiny design decision. I was ready to turn it on and start my new life.

Hey - not so fast.

After diddling around on my computer with two iPhones and their two different connectors for a while Jo concluded that my Macbook's OS (Leopard) was too primitive to load the version of iTunes (10.7) that the new iPhone (5) was willing to speak to. And there was no reasonable way to upgrade my computer's OS because the current OS (Mountain Lion) couldn't talk to Leopard and Apple had stopped selling the next upgrade (Snow Leopard) some time back. No new OS. No iTunes upgrade. No working phone.

So Jo made an appointment for me to visit the geniuses at the bar who have a secret archived copy of Snow Leopard on a drive that they used to upgrade my computer. Then I upgraded iTunes to 10.7. Then Jo spent a fruitless two hours trying to make my new iPhone talk to my new iTunes. And finally almost 12 hours after the new iPhone arrived home I could make a call. Yea!

Along the way the poor genius who was my guy at the store had to put up with my crap.

"Hey Vivian - this is Jerry. He's a genius. You can ask him anything. In his free time he upgrades software."

"Jerry - what genius thought up of this? Oh - you are all geniuses."

If you wear a shirt to work that says "genius" you have to be willing to put up with the shit. Which Jerry took in his stride.

The iPhone 5 may be the most advanced phone out there. iOS 6 is probably the best mobile OS on the planet. The display is breathtakingly sharp. I'm pretty sure that I'll use this phone happily for years to come. Thanks for the thoughtful and wonderful birthday gift, Jo.

But Steve is dead and the mojo is gone. It's not like you have to run out and buy a clone from Samsung or anything. But be warned.

Today - Or How I Managed to Blow Another Day Without Doing Shit

05:25 Hear dad wandering around. Bathroom trip. Put him back in bed. Me too.
06:50 "Hello Dada". Evan is up. Chat and cuddle. Evan asks for apple sauce. Give him apple sauce,
07:05 "Dadda - what is this?" pointing to apple sauce like it's alien slime
07:30 Jo and Vivian traipse into the morning
07:55: Finish stuffing two eggs in my face, kiss kids goodbye and head for RedBlack gym
09:05 Crawl back home feeling sorry for myself
09:25 Lay on floor for 20 minutes. Don't know that this is going to be the best part of my day
10:00 Chat with Dona. Wake my dad.
11:00 Feed dad breakfast
12:00 Take soccer stuff and Dona to Domain to meet Jo for lunch
13:00 Lunch takes too long. Dona and Jo will take my order to go. Soccer time
14:00 Crawl back into car from soccer - can barely drive home. Feeling even sorrier
14:10 Grab a clean t-shirt, feed dad lunch
14:30 Leave for airport with Dona via Austin Cake Ball. Apologize for general lingering sweaty stink
15:30 Back home from airport, start business call on skype
17:30 Finish call. Go to Central Market
18:15 Meet Jo at Crossfit Central, swap cars and bring groceries and kids back home for dinner
18:30 Cook dinner for kids and dad (different menus)
19:30 Kids and dad fed, start cooking our dinner. Kids start cleaning up.
19:35 Jen arrives, open first bottle of wine
20:00 Travis arrives, open second bottle of wine. Kids start watching movie.
20:30 Jo arrives, start serving dinner
21:00 Jo puts kids to bed
22:00 Finish dinner, start getting dad ready for bed
23:00 Dad in bed
23:01 Finally take off those god damn soccer shoes
23:30 Finish blogging for today

Chicken Party

On Saturday Vivian had two birthday parties. The first was across the street - Eleanor turned six. It was a fun party for a lot of reasons but the kids loved it most because of the friendly chickens.

Pumpkins

Yesterday Jo went shopping at Whole Foods. And Dona and the kids and I entertained ourselves outside the store and up in the play area. Evan indelicately straddled a couple of large pumpkins while Vivian looked like Cinderella a minute after midnight.

Margarita

What's a trip to Austin without a couple of ritas anyway. So while Vivian toiled away at school we took Dona downtown for a drink this afternoon. Evan asked her:

"Didi - what you drinking?"
"A margarita"
"Can I drink your margarita?"
"No Evan - drinking a margarita will hurt your head" [from Jo]
"Only Didi drink margarita. It will hurt my head" he declared. Several times.

Cousins

My cousin arrived this morning. Dona carries a big responsibility - the first cousin from the Chatterjee fam that Vivian and Evan have encountered in Austin. Six of their first cousins live down the interstate. Three more in Florida. A couple more somewhere. And then there are the Burns cousins in Nebraska - by the truckloads. So Vivian and Evan probably think that cousins only come in one flavor - the Clark-Burns flavor. Till now.

Dona is charming the kids. She had Evan sitting on her lap and refusing to come to me. And Vivian magic-ing her into princesses and frogs and back to princesses. And my dad was almost chatty (by his standards). This evening however we leave the kids with a sitter (thanks, Ingrid for the last-minute rescue) so we can show Dona a bit of Austin-weird city life.

Smile

My dad smiled today. Several times. The change in his alertness is quite amazing. Though he still sleeps or sits with his eyes closed most of the time.

Everyone is pitching in. Evan is the most engaged. He hangs out with Grandpa. Tugs is sheets off him and asks him to wake up. Asks me why "Grandpa not speaking?" Chugs milk and shares animal crackers with him. And grabs his hand and tries to haul him off to the dining room. Even Crazy the cat is doing her part. She just keeps out of his reach and makes him come after her to try and pet her.

But seriously the change is dramatic. Last week he didn't recognize Miguel and Viviana. And didn't acknowledge the Shahs when they visited. Today he was practically chatty with Miguel and Viviana. And he did chat with the Shahs. I know these improvements aren't monotonic. And can't go on for ever. But for now I'm enjoying seeing the positive change in him every day.

Our Children's Lives

Did I mention that we are completely and hopelessly involved in our children's lives. I was at Vivian's school for four different things today. And that's not counting Jo's trip to pick her up after school. First drop-off. Then a fundraiser meeting. Followed by Peace Day celebrations. And finally topped off with a teacher meeting.

The teacher meeting was interesting. Vivian is still rolling her eyes at her teachers. And doing pretty much what she wants to in class. The teachers admit that she is getting  along fine academically. They concede that she is showing leadership skills and is very good socially. But she doesn't listen to them. They told me that she has to respect her teachers. I told them that I wasn't the disciplinarian type and that they needed to earn her respect. And to try the love-and-logic method on her. And that the last time this happened I saw tears in her teachers' eyes before things got better. But that things did get better and then they got along fine after a couple of months.

Haircut

So Evan got a haircut today. Jo took him to a barber shop and he returned with gel-slicked hair. And a whole new attitude. Here's the before and after.

The before picture, in addition to being before is also a breakfast action picture. It's a chore to get Evan and Vivian up and fed and changed and to school in the morning. At least that's what I hear. And here's Vivian downing her butter and jam toast.

  

Soccer Practice

Brendan and I are soccer coaches for half a dozen five year olds and their assorted younger siblings. We meet every Wednesday in the park and kick a few balls around and have a good time. In fact it's unfair to call it soccer practice. It's really an excuse for the old class from Grace Garden to get together. Yesterday after practice one of the kids kicked a ball into the pond. Luckily there was someone fishing at the other end and he came over with his rod and reeled the ball back in.

Sometime earlier in the evening Evan had stood on a fire-ant anthill for a few moments and ended up with a few bites. He quickly forgot the bites and ran around the play scape till I had to run him down when it was time to take the kids back home. He kept saying "I step in anthill" and I had to suppress a laugh because it sounded so much like "I step in asshole".

Broke House

There is a certain small disfigured spot on the dining room floor that I am to blame for. The incident  happened a few months ago. Evan and Vivian were sleeping peacefully and didn't hear the sound that accompanied the action which resulted in said hole. But they've heard the story a few times since.

Fast forward to yesterday afternoon. Evan had returned from school and was in his manic phase - when he's so tired that he says "I not sleepy" and 'No nap" repeatedly till he falls asleep. So it was surprising that he had a lucid moment. He was on the floor of the dining room and he pointed to the hole and said "Daddy make this hole". Jo agreed. Then Evan made this fake sad face he can do so well where he looks sad and closes his eyelids. And he said "Daddy broke my house".

Singing

Today Vivian had the day off. So that her teachers could work without their students. For  non-American readers of this blog, I'm not joking.

We went to China Cafe for lunch. The kids devoured their "wod-tod" soup as Evan calls it. And then hung around till fortune cookie time. Vivian got one that was interesting. Then we got back home and put Evan down for his nap. He didn't protest but he didn't go to sleep either. When Vivian and I left for Whole Foods, Evan was singing in bed. I told Jo that he'd be asleep in minutes.

I had the radio on in the car. When we reached Whole Foods and Vivian and I were walking across the parking lot I heard her hum:

I'm a joker, 
I'm a smoker  
I'm a midnight toker 
I get my lovin' on the run

Followed by "Daddy - what's a toker?"

At Whole Foods Vivian was a big helper picking out snow peas and portabella mushrooms. Then she selected a startling orange bunch of tulips for "my Mamma" and posed with them on the pumpkins. We got home more than an hour later. Jo was fast asleep but Evan was still singing. Not Steve Miller though....

A Year Ago

Looking through my pictures from last September, these two seemed to represent what we were doing a year ago. In the first photo we are at Khairatbad market. We had just jostled with the crowds to see the giant three story tall statue of Ganesh, the elephant god. Vivian and Evan were beginning to get a taste of the Indian urban landscape and sights and smells and people.

In the second photo the kids are enjoying an essential Indian experience - the bucket bath. Water is scare. Electricity even more so. The bucket bath is resource efficient and a good soak.

Lady Bird

I still call it Town Lake. But this morning when I paused to enjoyed the view from the Mopac foot bridge and a flock of doves and cliff swallows exploded into the air in front of my face Lady Bird Lake seemed like an apt name. 

It's finally getting to the outdoor part of the year in Austin. Jo and I took Evan and Vivian to the lake yesterday. They had a good time and Evan wanted to stay. We said "bye" and took off and he showed no signs of getting anxious. I had to walk back and pick him up and put him on my shoulders.

Thinking About It

Vivian and Evan are growing up fast. They challenge my old ways of thinking all the time.

When I often find myself telling Vivian and Evan that they shouldn't believe everything they hear including what their teachers tell them (religious pre-school is interesting in that way), the next logical step is to tell them that they shouldn't believe everything I tell them. I've taken that step long ago.

Which often makes me wonder - how will they know what to believe? Evan can't be an expert on everything that matters. So he must have proxy experts. People and institutions he and Vivian trust as a source of information. For instance I somewhat trust the New York Times. Not to the extent I would trust the Pope if I was a devout catholic. But at least as a first level filter. Here's an article that a friend posted on FB yesterday- a news story about how Big Oil and Coal is funding Romney because Obama isn't as pro-fossil fuel as they are used to. I didn't wonder if NYT made up the numbers. I trust them to that extent. 

Another example. The Shah's don't drink water right before or after meals. Helps the body absorb nutrients from the food they eat, they say. I've made a bit of fun at their expense on this topic before (though I don't usually drink fluids during meals unless it's a half-decent wine). Jo is in the middle of a course on nutrition (Fuel21). The creator of the course is Crystal - a crossfit coach we've known for a few years. Crystal told Jo the same thing about water and meals. Jo is much more likely to believe it when it comes from Crystal.

Then there are things that may have been facts back then but I know to be untrue now. Or approximate. Newtonian physics before Relativity. Speciation and Darwin. Stuff that I assumed Fareed Zakaria wrote. Lance and doping. Being able to change my position isn't a bad thing when there is new evidence. Many things that Vivian and Evan are taught as facts today will change during their lifetimes.

You say be like a compass. Unwavering and true forever. But what of the true north, of which the compass' magnetic north is only an approximation. What of the compass' north changing from place to place and from time to time? What of the occasional complete flipping in the earth's magnetic field? The compass looks more like a wind vane.

I don't want to tell my children what to believe. Teaching them how to think for themselves is good enough for me.

What Are You Reading

I met Marion today. She is trying to clear some stuff from her and Gerhard's palatial home and put the home up for sale. Her husband Gerhard died a few months back. He was ninety. He was actively reading this pile of books.

What's on my bed side table? It took me two fourteen-hour flights to finish "The Orphan Master's Son". An amazing fictional story set in North Korea. Nice but not exactly "Non-equilibrium Thermodynamics and the Production of Entropy".

A Day in the Life of a Dad

We are up to our eyeballs in our children's lives. Here's a day in my life.

I hate mornings. Anything before 8am should be made illegal. Or blasphemous. My kids usually jump on me sometime between seven and 7:30 unless my wife nudges me awake before that with a sharp elbow to the spine - a tactile reminder that it's my turn to wake up with Evan, our early riser. Evan's first words always are "I food hungy". I take them to Upper Crust for a breakfast of cinnamon rolls, black gold cookies and chocolate milk. Or, that's when I retire to the loo and stay there till Vivian runs in and tells me that everyone else is already in the car. Somehow by this time the kids have been dressed, fed, hair braided, water bottles filled, Evan's lunch fixed, Vivian's homework in her backpack, and taekwondo and soccer gear in their bags. Evan's hat on his head. Thank goodness for elves. Or Jo.

We drive to Vivian's school. Eight minutes. Pull up by the front door. "Curly haired man" opens the car door and says more things in Spanish in one second than I will hear during the rest of the day. Vivian has been practicing her "Beunos dias" all morning but is stunned into silence. Curly's finale is something like "Adios Mamma, adios Pappa" and then they are gone.

Drive to Evan school. 7 more minutes. During which Evan asks and makes sure we haven't forgotten that he too needs to go to school. "Daddy, what going now?" What is is his standard question word. Easier than remembering where and who and when and all that stuff. Walk Evan to class. Teachers swoon over him. "Bye bye Dadda. I'ma vuv you".

Home. Wake dad up. Put him in a chair. Hot glass of milk for him. Then breakfast for him and me. It's the only meal he eats easily and I look forward to doing breakfast with him. Between that and noon I do stuff. Sometimes it's related to Vivian's school - like attending their innumerable parent meeting sessions.  Then my pick-up soccer game. Run home and feed dad lunch. Then pick up Vivian unless it's taekwondo day in which case pick her up an hour later.

Meanwhile Evan is back home and napping. Evenings are crazy. So far this week we've had one soccer practice for Vivian, two school events, and date night. While Brendan and I are coaching the older kids, the younger ones have a good time playing in the park. Here's a photo of Evan and Rowan.

Somewhere here kids get ready for bed. Bed time stories. Hugs and kisses. Good night. Then feed dad dinner. Put him to bed. Then I crack open a beer. I haven't done this is decades. I clearly remember the time in my life when I stopped trying to drink all the beer in my fridge in one evening. It was strange to be so grown up. Suddenly I'd have beer in the fridge for days at a time. Then weeks, months. Now it's back down to days. Not good. The other morning I opened the liqueur cabinet to grab a largish shot glass to use as an "egg cup" - to serve my dad a soft-boiled egg for breakfast. Jo walked in  and noticed the liqueur cabinet open. "Arun - you starting early this morning?" I am shocked by the lack of shock in her voice.